Accepting Change
by ShilohsHeart
Summary: Eddy is having conflicting feelings for Double D and doesn't understand what's happening to him. Will he be brave enough to tell anyone how he feels? Or will he suffer in silence? Rated M for possible themes in later chapters
1. Chapter 1

There may be some smut in some later chapters, we'll have to see

I don't own any of these characters, and I do apologize if I can't make Double D sound as smart as he really is ;/;

Chapter 1

It was raining. The hot pavement below Eddy's feet drank up the cooling rain like it hadn't ever been rained on before as he walked home from school, alone, again. The two boys, his best friends, wanted to follow him, begged to follow him, and their needy, confused eyes were burned into his brain, but he just...wanted to be alone and gather his thoughts. Eddy, the shortest of the Ed boys, shifted uncomfortably in his quickly dampening clothes and sat on the side of the road. He put his head in his hands, his wet black hair falling limp. In high school now, everything was all so confusing. So...complicated. Why couldn't he get it together?

"Eddy, you're so dumb." he murmured to himself bitterly. "What happened to Nazz? Do you not find her attractive anymore? What's wrong with you?"

Sighing, he picked up a rock and threw it, hard, watching it skirt across the pavement when it landed. He was starting to get cold now, but he didn't care. Getting to the cul-de-sac and to his house was the last thing on his mind. He stood up and crossed his arms, walking slowly along the sidewalk. Maybe what his brother said all those months ago was true. He just had too much pride to admit it. He didn't want to admit it. Just the very thought made him sick to his stomach.

Eventually he found that he'd wandered into his yard and opened his sliding door, shivering and wet, to find Double D sitting on his bed, like he'd been waiting. Color rose to his cheeks, but he didn't know why. "Sockhead? What are you doing here?" Eddy asked as he slid the door closed, ignoring the skinnier boy's tsking at him being wet and possibly catching a cold. He didn't care.

"I wanted to wait for you." Double D told him, nervously licking the gap in his teeth as he often did. "I wanted to make sure you were alright. You did seem dreadfully withdrawn and subdued. Ed even noticed."

Eddy sighed a bit, running his fingers through his dripping hair. Had he been acting strange? He'd tried not to show it. "I'm fine,Sockhead." he said softly after a minute, kicking his shoes off and sitting to pull off his socks. "I needed to think. That's all."

Double D sat in silence, watching him as if he didn't believe him, but said nothing. Eddy noticed for the first time that he'd been letting his hair grow out, and how his eyes widened just a little when he was concerned, how...nice..the features of his face were... He felt a blush warm his cheeks and shook off the thoughts, kicking his shoes into the corner.

"Here." Double D approached him with a pile of clean clothes. "Knowing you were out in the rain, heaven knows why, I'd taken the liberty of getting you dry clothing materials so you won't come down with any sickness from being chilly too long."

Eddy took them and smiled a little. "Thanks." He looked up into the other boy's face, wondering, wondering, then blinked when he stepped bank. "Yes, well. I should be getting home to finish the chores mother set out for me to do today. Do get some rest, Eddy. You look exhausted." Double D smiled, giving him a look of genuine concern, before putting on his yellow rain coat and hat and stepping outside, closing the door behind him.

"Bye." Eddy said softly into the empty air, then got up and went into his bathroom. He needed to shower.

The hot water ran down the boy's cold skin as he faced the back of the shower, his forehead resting against the wall, fists balled up in apparent anger. But who was he angry at? Himself? He slowly turned and slid his back down until he was sitting, staring up at the ceiling. He was angry at himself. Angry that he was having these confusing feelings. Angry that he knew it was wrong. And most of all, he was angry that he couldn't ever tell Double D any of this.

Double D was his best friend. His best GUY friend. You weren't suppose to have..ugh..crushes on your best friend. Especially if he's a guy. Eddy slammed his fist against the floor of the tub in anguish, closing his eyes against the flood of emotion. Why? Why couldn't he be like all the other guys and like breasts, curves and perfume? Why couldn't he just be normal?

Eddy eventually got dressed and crawled into bed, pulling the pillow over his head to block out the light. He'd just have to forget this whole thing. Forget all of it. He'd have to go back to just being them. He and Sockhead and Lumpy. How it was suppose to be.


	2. Chapter 2

Sorry Ed isn't in much of this chapter ;3; I'll try to include him more.

Chapter 2

Pangs of hunger slowly awoke the drowsy Ed boy from his sleep and he rolled from the bed, grumbling to himself. Just before he could lumber from his room there was a loud knock on his door, followed by a silence, then "Ding dong!" Ed. Eddy smiled a little and went to the door, sliding it open. "What is it, Lumpy? I was just going to get dinner."

Ed stood there with a dumb look on his face, seeming to be thinking about what he'd said, then broke into a wide grin. "Sleepover at my house!" he proclaimed excitedly, grabbing Eddy's shirt collar and tugging. "You gotta come, Eddy! Double D said so!"

Eddy's cheeks flamed and he tried to hide it by turning away. "Uh, okay. Alright. Lemme pack my stuff and I'll be over."

"Yay!" Ed gave him a giant bear hug and scampered from the house to his own, singing about how he was going to watch monster movies all night with his two best pals. Eddy let out a soft chuckle and went to his closet, grabbing a blanket, pillow and pajamas. Why had Sockhead insisted on him coming? Was he worried? Was there something on his mind? The possibilities were endless. Eddy stuffed his blanket in his pillowcase and called from his room that he was sleeping at Ed's house. His parents never did mind. They knew his friends were good kids. He slid out the door and wandered across the sunset laced grass, pausing a moment to stare at the sky. Maybe...maybe tonight would be the night... Was he brave enough? Probably not. Sighing, he shook his head and wandered to Ed's yard, knocking on the basement window and sliding inside when it opened.

The night had been an eventful one. Ed cleverly avoided dumb Sarah trying to boss him around or she was "telling Mom" all the while keeping them entertained with his vast arrays of snacks, comics and scary movies. Eddy laid on his stomach and rested his chin in his hands, staring at the tv and watching monsters terrorize a city, chuckling a bit at how bad the quality was. Ed's horror films were always low quality, but he loved them, and Eddy could stand watching them. He rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling, smiling to himself. He felt much better now, after having his mind on other things, and spending time with Double D helped him as well.

"Hey, Sockhead." Eddy smiled when he caught the other boy watching him, trying not to let his cheeks redden. Double D smiled back at him, setting his book of whatever smarty thing he was reading aside.

"You look to be feeling better," He said, watching Eddy with an emotion that he couldn't label. "Are you though?"

Eddy nodded, sitting upright. "Yeah. I feel a lot better." He looked down a little, trying very hard not to stare. He'd always found Double D attractive, but tonight... The boy had his long hair combed nicely out the back of his hat, his face looked soft and warm, with gentle eyes that gazed at him with something like affection, but Eddy couldn't tell.

Double D seemed to notice him looking away and his head tilted the slightest bit. "What seems to be the matter? Something on your mind?"

Eddy's cheeks reddened immensely and tried to hide it, but didn't know how. He sat in silence for what felt like a while. The concerned Double D moved closer to him, resting a hand on his shoulder. Eddy's heart quickened.

"You know you can tell me anything, don't you?" Double D asked softly, looking into Eddy's eyes. Eddy almost fainted right then, but that would've been a sissy move so he fought to keep himself upright. "Uh.. Yeah.. Yeah I do." Eddy said softly, then felt horrible for lying. Double D smiled in satisfaction and moved back, picking up his book again to continue reading. Eddy sat very still, his heart racing and face very flushed, trying to get the images of him kissing Double D out of his mind. It was just wishful thinking.


	3. Chapter 3

Okay first of all I'm sorry for the lack of updates .3. I was having a bit of writers block. Second of all this chapter sucks xD just saying. Any ideas for what I should have happen next? Please? ;-;

The night had gone by rather slowly. Darkness enveloped the house as the three boys sat in front of Ed's tv, watching reruns of that old fish show and telling jokes, Eddy pitching scam ideas every now and then that didn't seem to have any future. It was a peaceful time, and it made Eddy forget his feelings and conflicted-ness for a while.

"Double D." Ed turned toward the thinner of them, a certain confused look on his face that he often got when he didn't understand something. "Yes, Ed?" Double D tilted his head a little, smiling in that friendly way he did. He was always open to Ed's questions, no matter how obvious the answer was.

Ed sat silently a moment, as if pondering, then broke into a grin. "Can we go get one of Rolf's chickens to join our sleepover?" Double D let out a laugh, and Eddy did too, both looking at Ed fondly. Eventually Double D answered, "I'm sorry Ed but those are Rolf's chickens. I don't think he'd appreciate it." Ed sighed, pouting. "Aww. No fair.." Double D frowned, patting Ed's head. "I'm sorry, Ed. Maybe one day we can get you some chickens." Ed's eyes lit up and he began grinning, bouncing a bit where he sat. He began babbling on and on about the chickens he'd get, and Double D smiled at Eddy, looking pleased that he'd cheered the other boy up. Eddy smiled softly back at him, his cheeks reddening.

"I'm gonna get more snacks!" Ed proclaimed, leaping up and dashing up his basement steps, leaving Double D and himself alone. The silence was unbearably heavy. It made Eddy feel uneasy, so he felt relieved when Double D finally said something. "Tonight has been grand, hasn't it Eddy?" Eddy simply nodded with a small smile, looking away, which made Double D look at him with some concern. He tried not to notice.

"What is it, Eddy? I've noticed you've become quite...flustered as the night has gone on." Eddy stared hard down at his bare feet, trying to fight back the deadly blush spreading over his face. "Oh I'm fine, Double D, really." He smiled just a little, a weak smile that made Double D look even more suspicious, but he sighed instead of pressing. "Alright then. But there's something going on. I see it in your eyes."

As if on instinct, Eddy looked away quickly, beginning to chew on his lip. What did his eyes have to tell? He jumped a bit out of his thoughts when Double D gently patted him on the head. "You can tell me whenever you're comfortable with doing so. And I promise you that I won't ever get offended or mad, okay?" Eddy smiled and nodded softly, murmuring a reply just as Ed came back with an armful of unhealthy snacks.

The lights were off and the house was silent as the two Eds slept, but one was left lying awake, none other than Eddy. His mind was buzzing too much for him to sleep, as well as Ed's usual heavy snoring, but it was easy to ignore. Pulling his blanket around himself, he quietly made his way to the window and climbed out it into the yard, relieved to find that the rain had stopped and the moon was shining brightly, making it easy to see. Almost like it was daytime, he thought to himself. He slowly walked across the grass and through the yard, trying to decide where to go. He walked a bit of a ways until he found a large rock under a tree, large enough to sit on, and did just that, holding the blanket around himself and staring at the stars in the sky. He sighed softly, leaning against the tree trunk to his left and resting his eyes a little. "Why can't I just be normal?" he said aloud, "I just want to be like everyone else. But..but I can't seem to be anymore." He stared down at his hands. "I guess...I'm gonna do it. I'm going to talk to him just like he said I could." He clenched his fists confidently. "I'm going to go up to him and say 'Double D, I've liked you for a long time, and I want to know if you share the same feelings.' And if he doesn't, at least he'll know how I feel, right?" The thought of Double D not sharing the same feelings made his stomach churn uneasily. "But..but if he does share the same feelings..then..then.." A blush rose to his cheeks and he smiled a little, resting his head on the tree. "Then maybe..maybe..we'll become something special.." His eyes closed and he slowly dosed off to the thought of Double D actually liking him back. Little did he know the sock-headed boy was standing a little ways off, watching in silence as Eddy fell asleep against the tree.


End file.
